live, love, hurt

This post stuck out at me because of a few things, First off, it was my first MRI, which was totally normal. My recent (late 2009) radiography shows otherwise. It took years for my films to start showing the pain that I was feeling. Unfortunately physicians cannot get a “serum pain level,” and all the worse for it. The “pain management center” I mention was actually nothing of the sort. It was one exam room in the hospital that was staffed by one physician, who immediately upon my entering assured me that he “doesn’t prescribe anything except tramadol.” He ended up sending me to physical therapy for two months, which did more bad than good. Then he discharged me, and nothing changed.

I forgot about this for a while. The MRI and x-rays were “normal” according to the “report.” No one even looked at the films except for the techs, so they wouldn’t even let me see them. I don’t know that I trust the techs. Nothing I can do about it, apparently. The doctor at the clinic basically said he had no idea, and referred me to a pain management center. I’ve been calling them since then, and as far as I can tell they’re never actually open. My dad, who also has back problems, gave me some Norco (hydrocodone-10mg/acetaminophen-375mg). I got nine, which is 18 doses since I take them in halves. I’ve used one whole one so far.

I have no idea what this pain clinic will do for me, if anything. I currently owe the hospital like $5k. I’m waiting on their decision for the charity program.

I’m trying to desperately not hold my breath.

I haven’t had any major incidents since the last post, which was awful. I went ice skating a few days ago, which I could only manage to do for about 20 minutes before the pain was too much. It hurt pretty much all day. That was the day I took my first half of the Norco. I guess I’m not allowed to live life anymore.

I actually ended up getting on the charity program, but that only waives the hospital fees. I still got the doctors’ bills. I still owe on some of them. This was also the first time I noticed the pain starting to affect my leisure activities, such as ice skating.

This was one of dozens of “daily pain” posts that I wrote, but it stuck out at me because I mentioned taking three co-codamol (Tylenol #3) was “harsh.” Compared to my current medications (fentanyl, oxycodone, and others as of Feb 2010), three co-codamol is absolutely not even close to a drop in the ocean.

I woke up around 8am with a pain in the 3 or 4 range. I’ve been holding off on taking the co-codamol unless it’s above 5 or keeping me from sleeping. I can’t keep taking them like I have been. Three a day is harsh and I worry about taking them. Eventually they’re going to run out and I’ll have no relief.

I’ve been taking these meds for five days now. I’ve noticed that my pain is no longer constant, but it comes and goes all day. It gets bad when it’s getting close to time for another dose. So obviously, either the naproxen or the cyclobenzaprine is doing something to lessen the pain. How do I know which? I don’t like the cyclobenzaprine, it makes me tired and gives me really bad dry-mouth. Maybe if I get refills I’ll just try the naproxen next week and see how it goes. One of them is helping, but even so the pain is still very much there and I still have to use the co-codamol, which itself only helps partially, but it’s much better than a week ago when I had nothing to manage the pain. I’m at least no longer afraid to go to work.

Today was a pretty good day pain wise, but I pretty much laid around and did nothing all day. I went out for a few hours later that night and my back started throbbing, but I just came home and laid down.

As it turns out, I did run out, and I had no relief. No one wants to refill an ER script. It was probably six months or longer before I had doctor-sanctioned pain relief again.

This was the first post I ever made on my real blog that dealt with my pain. It also noted the first time I tried to seek medical help.

Went to St. Anthony’s ER tonight for my back pain. The doctor asked me some questions, did an exam, and wrote prescriptions for Flexeril (cyclobenzaprine), a muscle relaxant; Naprosyn (naproxen), an anti-inflammatory, and; Tylenol 3 (co-codamol) for pain. I’m also supposed to keep a “pain journal” which details my pain for the day and lists which drugs I’ve taken that day. I’m setting this up to publish the day’s entry at 4am the next morning, so the posts will all be one day ahead, and are in reference to the previous day.

Not much said, but it began what would turn out to be a very long and painful endeavor that changed my life forever.